Deteriorata

2008-01-02 - 11:25 a.m.

Lots of little news items today:

A Chicago lawyer keyed a Marine's car, became verbally abusive to the Marine when he was caught in the act...and then, when the police showed up, said he was being accused of doing the damage "because he was Jewish". Then, he began using legal tricks to avoid being prosecuted. Here's the story.

You can dislike the military if you choose to. But property damage isn't the way to show it.

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Walter Williams weighs in here on the politics of greed. Evidently performance has nothing to do with anything.

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Global warming? Really?

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Whilst celebrating New Year's Eve in France, vandals burned 372 cars...and this is being called "relatively calm".

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In Vancouver, a sixteen-year-old McDonald's employee suddenly felt ill and ran to the bathroom...where she gave birth.

She said she didn't know she was pregnant. You'd think not having a period for several months would have given her some kind of clue.

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Now, today's title comes from National Lampoon. With all the fun going on in the world, maybe we need a little silliness. Here's the lyrics:

Go placidly amid the noise and waste, and remember what comfort there may be in owning a piece thereof.
Avoid quiet and passive persons, unless you are in need of sleep.
Rotate your tires.
Speak glowingly of those greater than yourself and heed well their advice, even though they be turkeys.
Know what to kiss... and when.
Consider that two wrongs never make a right... but that three do.
Wherever possible, put people on hold.
Be comforted that in the face of all aridity and disillusionment, and despite the changing fortunes of time, there is always a big future in computer maintainance.

Remember the Pueblo.
Strive at all times to bend, fold, spindle, and mutilate.
Know yourself. If you need help, call the FBI.
Exercise caution in your daily affairs, especially with those persons closest to you...that lemon on your left, for instance.
Be assured that a walk through the ocean of most souls would scarcely get your feet wet. Fall not in love, therefore; it will stick to your face.
Gracefully surrender the things of youth: birds, clean air, tuna, Taiwan...and let not the sands of time get in your lunch.
Hire people with hooks.
For a good time call 606-4311. Ask for Fred.
Take heart amid the deepening gloom that your dog is finally getting enough cheese, and reflect that whatever misfortune may be your lot, it could only be worse in Milwaukee.

You are a fluke of the Universe.
You have no right to be here, and whether you can hear it or not, the Universe is laughing behind your back.

Therefore, make peace with your god, whatever you conceive him to be: hairy thunderer or cosmic muffin.
With all its hopes, dreams, promises, and urban renewal, the world continues to deteriorate.

Give up.

Heh.

If you want to see the original, go here.

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Well, I have a doctor's appointment, and I have plans to stop by the PO beforehand. And then, of course, work.

Be seeing you.

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