Not A Second Time

2010-07-06 - 5:53 p.m.

This is what it takes to get me to post again - food news.

I'll do something tomorrow and/or Thursday, and that's a promise. But for now...

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Tuna went on sale a few weeks ago. So I bought a bunch.

Now, unlike Mark Evanier, I like my tuna salad with a few "extras" along with the mayo - namely, relish and (brace yourself) green taco sauce. The sauce gives it a nice tang.

Realizing that I had none of those things in my apartment, I bought a bottle of Kraft mayo and Vlasic Homestyle Sweet Relish. Both items come in squeezable bottles.

So I got home and had the tuna salad sans bread. Very tasty. The cats like it too, because I buy tuna packed in water and I pour the can squeezings into dishes and they get a treat. Serious om nom nom, people.

Now, I also like relish on my hot dogs. You know that "stadium dog" from Der Weinerschnitzel? Ketchup on one side, mustard on the other, with onions and relish on top? I've liked them that way for over twenty years.

Anyway, you have to be a bit more careful with the squeezable relish container when you're putting it on hot dogs, as opposed to squirting some into a bowl with your tuna and mayo. So I carefully squeeze...and only get pickle juice. The relish had clogged up at the opening.

I tap the contents to the bottom, then back to the top...and it happens again. Lots of pickle juice on my hot dog, but very little relish. I finally have to take the top off the container to get any...and of course, too much comes out. I wind up spooning the extra onto my other hot dogs.

This is annoying. The container design may not be right for this kind of relish. So I very seriously consider calling their customer service line. I check the back of the bottle for a number...

...and it turns out that Vlasic is owned by - you guessed it - Pinnacle Foods. The people I've dealt with in the past.

Here we go again. Hilarity will ensue. I just know it.

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Speaking of food...

Don't try this at home, gang.

No, really.

DON'T.

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The Angels @ White Sox game has been delayed by "inclement weather".

So, onward.

Be seeing you...soon.

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